11.16: Rant That Thang Up

Eastlake Titans 23, Bonita Vista Turdlickers 18 SUCK ON THAT ATHEISTS!

<><><><><>HAVE A NICE BIG @$$ PREVIEW<><><><><><><><><><>

What Is Hip?/Neidermayers & PM (some close to being dropped!)/InsanOlympics/Break The Wall 
Down!(ws)/Butch On How Life Is/

<><>El Preview Grande is brought to ya by The Boot.  The boot--96 hours in Eastlake's possession, and 
we're still trying to get rid of the funky smell and inbreeding.<><><><><><><><><><><><><>

Hey, yo.  It's me, the party host, the savior, the Ayatollah of Rant n' Rollah.  Another fortnight in, and 
another fortnight gone, and I still haven't drank since the beginning of July!!  Thank you for all the support 
and prayers.  Well, my life still sucks, applications, applications, applications.  All in a quest to get the 
damn hell out of the damn house.  I swear, it's like living with my grandparents except they're sharp.   
Anyway, I got a jackload of newspapers of me gracing the cover, so those of you coming down for 
Thanksgiving get a little triptophan (sic) with that turkey.  And I'm working on a story about the McBeal 
McLesbianism kisses, so that'll be hitting the stands in the days to come.  Got a new hat.  Well, I know, 
that's kind of boring, but hell, if you really wanted to help me socially, you'd get me a damn girlfriend!  Ah, 
I'm too angry at the world today.

On a lighter note, four of you are one rant away (and of course I mean ONE RANT AWAY) from being 
dropped, albeit temporarily, from the bi-weekly joy that is the Rant.  And the nominees are: Ulrike, 
Amanda D., Kenny, and Annie.  Others of you who have just started to dig your graves: Jessica, Sara, 
Caroline, and that's about it.  Everyone else is in the doghouse, or about to be talked to.  Type a fatty for 
pimp daddy and say rantin' ain't easy:

AMANDA: Yay!  You're coming to town!  How long you staying?  We got to catch up on old times and 
split a shake.  Pam says what's up, and call her when you get here, movie star.  Beat Stanford.

DIANE: Leave John alone for a while and update your site.  I want more me, damnit!  (no, that was not an 
egotistical comment, 20% of everything that's mine on the Internet goes to blind kids or something....)

DUSTIN: We got to get together on the site.  I can't buh-lieve you thought that we'd lose.  Tsk, tsk, tsk.  
Just how much of these flies over your radar?  Let me know when the Maxims start rolling in.   Who's 
house?  Run's house!

IVAN: The only explanation as to why you don't get attachments is because you suck.  That or the 
computer does.

CARLY: You so crazy.  Other stuff in BTWD!

ERIN: Still wavering on the bonfire thing. I'd like it to be a blowout of epic proportions as well.  Where 
you schooling at, anywhoozle?  I done forgot.

EVIL ERIN: Is Squiddy coming back for turkey?  Is there still comedy sportz where we used to go?

EVAN: Yeah, life's a bitch and then you die. Thank God I'm almost done.  While I typed that up, UCLA 
gave up another touchdown ;).

JO: Hiya.  You are coming back for turkey as well, yes?

MIKE:  Just keep thinking, "Peter Warrick, Peter Warrick..."

JASON: Thanks for the test.  I now know who to avoid.

SAMMY: BTWD! Foley documentary tomorrow and Owen tonight.

SANDRA: Is EVERYBODY but me in show business??!  The hell, man, that's why the damn applications 
are 60 bucks, you get to be on TV all the damn time!  Ah, I shoulda gone to a real college...frickin' algebra, 
lousy braniacs.

JUST HOW INSANE ARE YOU? (current standings):

Carly-83.6%

Mike-69.1%

Evil Erin-65.4%

Sandra-52.7%

Dustin-49.1%

Moi-44.7%

I attribute that to the fact that I haven't eaten salt in a while.

BREAK THE WALL DOWN! (wrestlesection)

Shame.  Y2J doing the JOB to Chyna.  And for those of you bitching that they're screwing Jericho, name 
how many US Title shots he got.  Now remove your foot from your mouth and back away.  Still, he has a 
chance to redeem himself, probably @ Armagedddon.  Big 3 in a Wrap:

ECW: New show on Channel 49 (no cable) @ Saturday at 1 P.M.  Nothing much else to say really, other 
than longer matches, and it's never too soon to start the march towards GAC 2000.

WCW: The guy who impersonated JR should be shot.  All the luchas should go to ECW that aren't in the 
Filthy Animals, Russo is obviously handing them a one-way ticket to Jobberville.  Still no Booker T push, 
another case of the man keeping us down.  Torrie...zow.  Norman Smiley shouldn't be "Screaming" he 
should be the "Emperor of Hardcore".  

WWF: Rock jobbing to Bossman to end the show?  Yeeesh.  Big Show/Bossman SHOULD NOT IN ANY 
WAY SHAPE OR FORM MAIN EVENT A PPV.  Cool that they gave Wight the title after the fake crap 
they've been pulling.  They need to plan Armageddon better than the slipshod matches at SurSer.  Until the 
Mean St. Posse become the Baker St. Irregulars, this has been BTWD, and you'll never, eeeeever forget it!

Songs: REM-"Great Beyond", G Love & Special Sauce-"Rodeo Clowns".

A LOT of good CDs coming, including the Metallica/Orchestra thing, a Beastie Boys compilation, a new 
3rd Eye Blind, and the recent releases from Rage Against La Machina and Foo Fighters.  GKMF: The 
Chargers, for sucking and making my job much harder.  And you thought I wouldn't turn on my employers.  
The next time I rant, it'll be end of the month and I'll probably have gained 10 lbs.  Adios muchachos, next!